Does your earring?

So I have been thinking about my Dad a lot lately (for those who don't know, my dad passed away around 8 years ago). I'm not sure why he's been in the front of my thoughts...it is probably just that there have been a lot of reminders around because of election time, the Christmas season, I've been playing a lot of Mariokart (a game we used to play until 3AM), I am currently drinking out of one of those frozen mugs (he always froze, and shattered, glasses in our freezer), and so on.

Speaking of Mariokart, here is who my Dad was all of those late nights while I spanked him at nintendo...

Who picks Wario? Seriously, of all the characters, Wario? But for some reason I think my Dad identified with him.

The funny part is that every single time he asked me if I wanted to play Mariokart, the dialogue would go exactly like this:

Dad: Nate, Wanna race?
Me: Dad, its 1:00AM
Dad: Come on, just a round of four...
Nate: Dad it always turns into more.
Dad: Remember how I pay for your car insurance.
Nate: It's a school night.
Dad: Turn it on, I'll go get me a Coke.
Nate: Are you sure you want to do this to yourself?
Dad: You're going down.
--45 races later...
Nate: I told you so Dad.
Dad: Let's just do four more...Nate?
Nate: (walking downstairs)

While there is some Wario resemblance, here is what my Dad really looked like (on the left...in case you couldn't tell):

This is the last picture that I have of my Dad (from my wedding, around a year before he died). My Dad always told me that my youth and good looks could never compete with his money and power (when we would argue who could better pick up on chicks). Now that I am older and wiser, I must say that I see the wisdom in his statement, and I agree.

Lately, I have been noticing more and more that have picked up a lot of my Dad's weirdness. I'll give one example:

No one was more fun than my dad at Christmas. He was as excited as any 8 year old kid on any given year. I am much the same. And because of that, he had a bunch of funky habits...all of which I have gladly picked up. I'm glad my wife lets me carry on with some of these things. For example, my Dad was funny about Christmas shopping. And my wife knows that I love to Christmas shop. So every year she saves some of it for me, even if she is in a position to get it done more efficiently (although I think deep down she knows --just like my mom did-- that if she didn't leave any, I would shop anyway and double up the budget--like my dad probably did most years).

*** Man Cave side note: It is acceptable for a man to love to Christmas shop as this is clearly distinguished from a love of shopping in general. A love of a limited list of other forms of shopping are also acceptable, such as: shopping for guns, motorcycles, sporting equipment, etc.

*** end side note.

I could name more weirdness that I have, but you'd have to know my Dad in order to think it was funny...hence, I will refrain from boring you.

So in tribute to my Dad, we are going to play a game in the Man Cave. This was a running game in my family for over 15 years (I think it may only be funny when you're really tired--or when someone thinks of a PG-13 or better combo). The title of this post gives any and all explanation necessary, but I'll start us off with one more. Hey Man Cave stalkers...Does your belt buckle?

P.S. I'll be real disappointed in my family if they don't start shooting these off without even thinking about it.

Too busy to blog

Between studying for the Patent Bar, and trying to catch back up with work after taking the time off to study, the Man Cave has been neglected. It won't cry about it, because it's a man...but deep down it really misses me. Despite this, it is happy that I passed the Patent Bar.

I'll come back soon Man Cave. That is, unless I have something else to do that is better. --Just like any true man friend.

BYU v. Utah

So I'm sitting here watching the game and I am torn...

I've been a life-long BYU fan. But I went to the U for 7 years, and am a fan. Utah needs the win for a BCS bowl...and an undefeated season would be cool. But for the vast majority of my life I have always wanted them to lose in a heads up game against BYU.

So I have to cheer for BYU out of habit, but I kinda want the U to win. It makes me feel a little dirty.

ManDate...with my wife

The longer I have been married, the more I have come to appreciate ManDates. For those wondering what ManDates are, I'll explain:

You know how there are those things that you like to do that makes your wife/mom/girlfriend roll their eyes? I have a lot of those things in my life. That is to say, I like many things that my wife thinks are really dumb. The beauty of ManDates is that they allow you to do those things with other guys in the same situation. ManDates let you go to the movies you want, eat at the restaurants you want, go to sporting events, and even play the manly games you want. For example, in the past couple of months I have been able to have some manly time with my friends while going sporting clay shooting, to a poker night or two, and I also got to see the new Indiana Jones movie (something that the H-Bomb would never have done --albeit rightly so).

So imagine my surprise when Heid came up to me and asked if we could get a babysitter for a few hours and go to dinner...and...wait for it...go target shooting with our handguns!

Now, my first thought was about how I just barely bought a decent chunk of life insurance. So you would imagine that maybe proficiency with semiautomatic weapons isn't the most desirable thing that I want for my wife at this point. But I decided that I will trust her.

I wish I could have taken pictures because she did awesome (plus pictures of chicks with guns are hot...if you don't beleive me, check out this video of Sarah Palin shooting automatic weapons http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1686894/sarah_palin_rifle_training/). Any women reading this post, just go ask a guy if that's cool.

BTW, Heidi looked way better. And if that weren't enough, in her second round she kept 10 out of 11 shots in a human-shaped target's head from 20 feet.

Here's a pic of Heid's gun (except her's has a laser sight in the grooves under the barrel)

It's a total girl gun, but it is so much more fun to shoot than my otherwise manlier guns.

Anyway, just when you think that the Mandate with my wife couldn't get any better... we knew that we would have a couple of extra hours of babysitter time, so you'd think we were chick-movie bound, but not so, we went to the gym. There was a slight hiccup when we had to stop at the outlet mall because someone forgot a sports-bra...but those are readily bought in the Adidas store, so we were all good because I kept entertained. It was fun being at the gym when we weren't in a hurry too (that never happens for me). We changed, worked out, changed, sat in the hot tub and relaxed, changed again, and then made our way home.

I have to say that this was by far the best date ever. Dinner, guns, and the gym. Thanks Heidi.

So in summary we can conclude:

ManDates = cool
ManDates with my amazing wife = Awesome

Patent Bar Update

So I thought I'd give you all an update...I've gone from consistently getting really bad scores on the practice patent bar exams, to getting barely failing scores. I have 3 weeks to go.

So, while my irrational fears have calmed in large-part, I am still taking suggestions on a "plan B" to keep Heidi around (preferably involving minimal violence).

Perspective in the Cave

Time for some Man-based irrational fears about my career.

Turns out that most men worry about stuff that makes little sense to worry about. The difference with men is that we are quicker to keep that stuff quiet. But just to show you that it happens, I'll give a sneak peek into my mind...


So, I'm taking the patent bar examination in a month. Passing this test is necessary in order to practice in front of the U.S. Patent Office (i.e. I don't really have a career without it). Oh yeah, and the test has a ~50% pass rate.

I took a practice test recently and didn't do that great (it is the first time I have really put in any effort). As I sit now, I'm left with a month to study...but my docket is filling up fast with work that will take that month.

Hence the fear. Here is where the irrational part comes in...

I know this stuff way better than the average bear who is about to sit for this exam. In fact, even with minimal effort I will probably be over-prepared. But, I still can't shake the what-if fear. As a result, doing bad on that practice test didn't help my daily cheerfulness yesterday...and it continues into today (and gets worse every minute I work and not study).

Then the uber-irrational slippery slope comes to play. It starts in my mind where I get fired. Then can't provide for those who depend on me. To top it off my wife decides to leave because "hey of I'm going to be poor, my husband should at least be good looking." And so on.......

Chances are that your husband, father, etc., are repressing similar things. So go easy on them the next time they have a hard day but don't express anything to you that appears to be something worthy to be in a bad mood about.

P.S. I know women do this also to an extent...but you've gotta admit, they are more open about it, or at the least you can easily perceive it and address it because it is not well hidden.

Express Your Emotions in the Cave

They say that men do not express their emotions very well. I disagree. Here is my emotional confession of the day:

I am experiencing Red Sox induced sadness today...and "Sweet Caroline" is making it worse.

--that's all. Now everyone knows how I truly feel.

Feel free to express your emotions in the Cave, on any subject, but especially on your sadness regarding the 3-1 deficit the Red Sox are facing.


***UPDATE:

My Red Sox sadness has experienced some turmoil of late. It has ranged from being Red Sox euphoria but is now full on Red Sox depression.

The Brown Monster

From afar...

From Austin's point of view...

I have concluded that this fence is Austin’s nemesis --- and the only way Austin can beat it, is by getting as many items of athletic equipment over it as humanly possible.  Maybe it talks smack to him.  Maybe it openly mocks him in front of the pretend crowd that cheers him on while he attempts in his many last second shots, touchdown passes, etc.  Even worse, maybe it talks in his backswing -- stupid fence, I hope Jose rips you up even more with his weed whacker.

I’ve got to admit though, it is a worthy opponent.  It kicked butt on those 100 MPH straight-line winds.  It even beat a tornado from 100 yards away.  When all other fences in the neighborhood faltered, it triumphed.  I guess what I’m saying is that the Brown Monster can beat the crap out of your fence.

Austin sure has kicked its butt over the past few months though.  The soccer ball has gone over it at least 20 times.  Add to that -- a  few baseballs, 3 different footballs, Frisbees, many many whiffle golf balls (which were subsequently ruined by Jose’s lawnmower), and so on.

Seriously though, Austin loves making things go over the fence.  It’s so weird.  He can reach three-quarters of the way up the thing, but yet, if he gets a ball over…it’s awesome!!  While this little game really bugs me, it still makes me wonder...what is he thinking?  Is it really a challenge?  Is it that instinct in human beings that makes us want to climb tall mountains, build the largest buliding, or make the fastest car?

...or is it just a stupid game that frustrates parents and inevitably leaves good equipment out in the sprinklers overnight.

For those that missed the obvious Sweet Caroline reference, here ya go.  It comes from the land of the Green Monster...my fence's hero.  Singing this song in the 8th inning will bring you all the luck in the world.  It may even break an eighty-six year curse.

If you play this, you'll want to pause the music on the bottom...otherwise it is really annoying.

Man Caves

I have a couple of man caves in my life.  They're awesome.  In fact, I’m sitting in one right now.  There are swords hanging on the wall to my left--and no one complains about it.  It has furniture that I like.  I have a docking station for my laptop that connects it my to home network, dual monitors, an awesome speaker system, etc.  Additionally, because this man cave being mine, and mine alone, it is almost always entirely clean.  But, by far the best part about this place is that when I am in here, there are brief moments that the world just feels right.  I know, it sounds weird, but it really does happen.  I attribute this to the fact that, in here, I have complete control  (clearly that doesn’t happen very much for me).

Ahhhh, there it is:

Lately, I have found myself having random thoughts that could readily be shared in an online forum.  Unfortunately, my wife doesn't exactly let me use her blog (I don’t think you can count that time that I hijacked it after she allowed her computer to remember her password).  Apparently she is a strict guardian of her blog's "integrity."  I guess her reaction is understandable, because usually what I have to say is somewhat on the dorky side.  It isn't my fault though.  I used up all of my vast quantity of awesomeness during our dating phase.  That is how I trapped her.

Anyway...

Hence, I have come to the inescapable conclusion that I need a place online where I have the control, i.e. a virtual man cave.  I envision this blog to be fairly random.  I won’t play any froo froo music (assuming I’m not making fun of something).  I won't mirror Heidi's chronicling of the family or her other experiences.  Nor would I want to…I actually really enjoy reading about my family from Heid’s perspective.  I will, however, give the "other perspective" on certain family events when I feel it is entertaining or necessary to defend my honor (I still remember that Christmas post from last year).   I know it may be surprising, but sometimes Heidi and I don't always think the same way about the same experiences.

So, welcome to the man cave.  Feel free to comment here…even if you think I’d think it was weird that you commented.  I blog-stalk people all the time.  In the man cave we wont judge you.  That is assuming, of course, that you don’t say something girly or really really gay…then I’ll make fun of you.